MY bLanknes..

It's Quite long since my last post...

man..i'm blank...wat shud i say...
SUPER BUSY AND LASY I AM..

it's coming to the end of semester now...5 more semesters to go...eiiikkkk...so fAST..
think about it...i'm goin to finish next year...so fast..
.then there will be seperation again...super fast...
haiz...

Assignments assignment assignments..i really wanna hit myself again 4 doin everything at last minute..its so hard..for once...Hey gurl will u be hardworkin..just a little?????

Wat bouT My DaNCE lIFe???
It's been quite hard too ya...i dun have the happiness much frm it anymore ya.
.maybe it's bcos of the pressure...
maybe they do not un..training last time was easy...Walking distance..afternoon training...
i had all the time..but not now..
i dunno how to say but..i'm quite dissapointed at myself..really..after so many years..what have i achieved????i suck so much that i dun even dare to look at myself at the mirror when i dance...haiz...

Dance has always been my thing...but y?i'm sad for it...it seems i'm nothing when it comes to this...
where do i stand...????

I'm totally blank..i need someone that i can share to...someone that understands my situation...
yeah...i do noe i have ppl whom i can share to...but they all have different thinkings then i have...different situations..i may be able to share abt dance to this person..but i cannt share othr stuff cos he/she might nt un...haiz...i need God more than ever..i'm scared i'm gonna backslide frm Him...

For Life is Only Once..MakE eVerDay thE As If ItS tHE OnLy DaY u Have...

the End...

My SwEEt VaLenTinE SToRy...

Hey...HERE's A rEally Sweet ValenTine's stOry..

Once..there's was this gurl..her name's linni..she was just in secondary school..
She was a cute little gurl with long brown hair.with the sweetest smile u'll ever see.a shy little gurl..sitting at the back of her class..hardly anyone notices her...But...there was this one boy she had a small little crush with..A boy name derek..he was a cute boy..short..but charming at his age..he was frm the class opposite.she could she him frm the window next to her.
each day..Linni would be so happie to go to class..just to get a glimpse of derek.
One day...Linni noticed there was a note left on her desk when she arrived to school.
The note was a small piece of paper torn frm an exercise book.
It says:

Hey, Linni right?i just wanna tell u...u have the prettiest smile in the whole school..
Can i be ur fren?

fROM:Derek..class xx

At that very moment.,linni's heart was jumping with joy..could this be the derek i liked..so,she replied derek's letter.. and as time pass on the became really close frens..
they would have break with each others..talking on and on to each other..until one day..there was a note again..this time it was on a red not cut into a heart shape..

Dearest Linni,

i like you,would you be my girlfriend?

Love,Derek

ANd that was her 1st boyfriend..They were really a sweet couple..really matching...
Derek had nothing much..he wasn't frm a rich family neither is Linni,but they we're happy with each other..
This was their small little love..
Befor school starts,Derek would wait for linni to arrive at the front gate..then they would walk together to class...Derek will send linni off to her class...during class they would peek on each other..When the recess bell rang,Derek would be at the door waiting for linni,then they would go to the small shed where linni would bring out her small little lunch box brought from home and share with Derek..after school they would spend time studying with each other...at times linni would just sit beside and watch Derek play basketball wif his friends..giving support to him..

Once when they had a chance to go out together..they were at this shopping mall..They hadn't much to spend.just a few ringgit in their pocket..enough to share a meal of Macdonalds and an ice cream..but that was just enough..they hadn't much to spend on a movie..but they found just a nice bench right in front of a video shop..
finally,when they passed by a jewelery store..linni told Derek,if we had money,we would buy a pair of matching rings for both of us..but Derek knew..it would take a real long time for them to be able to buy those rings..

The next day after dat,Derek gave linni a box..a small box..containing a ring from those toy vending machine..it was a pink rubber ring with an heart shape..linni was overjoyed..derek showed his finger to linni.another similar ring was on it..only that the ring he had on was blue..it was a matching ring..
although the ring was hardly 10 ringgit..but it was so precious to linni...this was how simple the love between both of them..they didn't think much..money wasn't a matter to them..they we're happy..

but as time goes on..and both of them grew up..finally they grew apart and went on their seperate ways..in to the next level of life..now..both of them had their own partners...but relationships in grown up life was way harder as there were different problems..money,family,career and so much more..it was hard..but that's life..

okie...end of story..this story may suck allot..but this is really how i wan my love to be..just that simple..
although many of you woud say..that it was just a puppy love..but how many of you would really have wanted ur relationship to be like dat....juz happy,simple n naive..
there wasn't much to be worried..even at times of low income...there is always a way to be happy..share a meal...cook together...that's so much better..no movies?stay at home and cuddle up together..study takes up most of ur time...study together...think about it..although it was just a puppy love..
but the trust and sincerity was frm the heart..we we're so unmature back then that we didn't feel that we will be losing this very person..we won't worry all the times..
we we'rent always arguing when the other person went out wif a fren...
it was just so somple..a smile..just a simple smile may brighten our day...dat was when we had the thought of a young child..

if i were to choose..i'd rather have a year of simple relationship like that then havin a 10years serious relationship with the maturity and unsecurity i have now...

i just wanna say..ppl..love can be just so simple..but to achive that simplicity is really hard...u gotta overcome ur ego ...ur selfishness..ur thoughts of a romantic date..come on..the best date ever is just seing each other ya...

that's wat i feel lar..
I don't want a guy whu is willing to sacrifice his life for me..if he was to die..i would be more sad and will be blaming myself..
i don't want a guy who can give a hundred roses..wats the point..the roses can't be eaten of kept..
i don't want a guy who would drive me frm home to penang..must as well i get a driver..
i don't want a guy who can would tell me i love you on the 1st day i meet him..show me man u love me..
i don;t need a man who can shower me with expensive gifts..is the heart that counts..a handmade card beats a diamond ring..

i once wrote..

Love is shown by actions,
Not promises,
Care is shown by love,
Not words,
Faith is shown by Trust,
Not sayings,
Trust is shown by believing,

Without Love,Care,Faith,Trust and believing,
A relationship will never be real,
Without all this,
A relationship will never exists
Even if everybody knows about it,
True love comes from the heart,
True love is not wanting t saccrifice lives for each other,
But to sacrifice the thime,feelings and heart...


God..May you Bless mE WIT A sImPLE lOVE LiKE Dat..

End..

My Song Of Love..

Is It You..CassIe

i'm lookin for a lover not a friend
Somebody who can be there when i need someone to talk to
i'm lookin for someone who won't pretend
Somebody not afraid to say the way they feel about you

And i'm lookin for someone who understands how i feel
Someone who can keep me real and who know
(the way)
The way i like to have it my way
And i'm lookin for someone who takes me there
Wants to share
Shows he cares
Thinkin ur the wan that i've been waiting for

Is it you?
Is it you?
Maybe ur the wan i've been waiting for
Could u be the want for me?
Could u be the want want i need?
Is it you?
Is it you?
Maybe ur the wan i've been waiting for
Could u be the wan for me?
(Could u be?)
Could u be the wan i need?

i'm lookin for someone to share my pain
(Uh)
Someone who i can run to
Who would stay with me when it rains
Someone who i can cry with thru the night
Someone who i can trust whose heart is rite
And i'm lookin for someone

And i'm lookin for someone who understands how i feel
Someone who can keep me real
And who knows
(The way)
The way i like to have it my way
And i'm lookin for someone who takes me there
Wants to share
Shows he cares
Thinkin ur the wan that i've been waiting for

Is it you?
Is it you?
Maybe ur the wan i've been waiting for
Could you be the wan for me?
Could you be the wan i need?
Is it you?
Is it you?
Maybe ur the wan i've been waiting for
Could you be the wan for me?
Could you ge the wan i need?

Someone who won't take for granted
How much i care
(How much i care)
And appreciates that i'm there
Someone who listens
And someone i can call who isn't afraid of love to share

Is it you?
Is it you?
Maybe ur the wan i've been waiting for
Could you be the wan for me?
Could you be the wan i need?
Is it you?
Is it you?
Maybe ur the wan i've been waiting for
Could you be the wan for me?
Could you be the wan i need?

This SonGs sINgS aBouT HoW LoVe sHULd Be Ya..cHecK iT ouT..

END..

My SigHt...

My eyeSight Is Getting Worst..iTs alReady Bad n Its GettIng WorsT..I Did Not Care Much About It untIl RecEntLy I Watched a Tv seRies..a Girl Lost her SiGHT AND gAIn it bak again...How afRaid she was to have lost it again..
1st..I thought..How great it was if i can be blind..
that in the way..i won't be able to see the cruels of the world and the sins of the world..
i would not be able to see ppl dying or killings..
and i would love without caring about the appearance..
how good is it..
but then..yesterday..when i took off my spec and off the lights..
i realise my vision was not as clear as before already..everythin was blur..
and fear held me...even now..i can't see clearly the words on the screen..i have to go closer..
wat if i really became blind.
.how would i be able to see my loved ones..
how do i protect them..
i won't be able to see the beatiful sights of this world again..
i won't be able to dance nor cook no more...
i'm really afraid nw..wat if one day really something happened to me?
will anyone care for me?will anyone be there for me..
will anyone remember me..
God..Pls..Take this fear away frm me..I'm really scared..really..

Without sight,
we will sin less,
we will feel less pain on the sufferings of the world,
we will shed less tears,
we will not see the cruel doings of man kind..

But,without sight,.
we live in darkness..
we only have the guidance through God's light..
we will noe less about the world..
we will onli hear voices.
we will live in fear..
we will not see the smilling faces of our loved ones..

Now,i un...
and i'm in fear..
God..Make me strong...

ENd...