Recently i have been backsliding from God..and i mean allot...
Although not very serious thing such as someone died or what but i am facing problems emotionally..well/...everything i do don't seem to get their way..it seems that i am a total failure..dance and cooking...i am no good in either..i even suck as being a fren..well...that's what i noe..
haiz...i'm not trying to gain anyones attention here but well./..i really dunno who to go to..
things are hard when there is no one to support u or even listen to u...at start..i thought maybe the Lord is the only one..yeah..it's really true..but i was greedy..i wanted more..i wanted humanly attention..therefore..i sulk and kept everything in hope that i'll find someone to pour out to..i talked to the Lord lesser and lesser and i was taking my own lead..chosing others over going to church..i made my own way..
and things just got much more miserable..
than after a long fight alone...well..i went to church yesterday..like normal..than..for the first time in many many many months,,,i answered the altar call..i didn't know why...but..i feel..welli wanted to see whether the Lord really would talk to me..and..HE DID~!!!!!
Aunty Jenny prayed for me...i dunno how she knew i was in a state of self disppointment..
The Lord have definitly told her..or spoke to me through her..
He said to me..all those weakness i felt that have brough me down..things that i felt i was useless and made myself witdrawn from amny people and kept to myself..all these thoughts was made by the devil..the Devil made me felt weak and hopeless..making me loose all self confidence.
AND SO..The Lord told me..never to believe all those things..He is always with meand he will support me in all ways..i believe..the Lord will bring me up..no matter how weak i am..in Him..i am strong~!..i really pray that i would find out what He wants me to do..and walk in His ways..or maybe i have already known but have not seen the importance in it..
Well,from this day on..i will fight the fight..with the support and the guidance of the Lord,My Father,My God..I KNOW hE WIll be there for me..therefore i will not feel alone and afraid..
he will reach out His hand to Hold on to me when i fall..same goes to everyone,...he has always been mergiful and graceful to me..although over and over again i went against Him..he never failed to bless me...Thank You Lord and do forgive me for all that i have done against You,FOr the Lord is my Strength
Peace..
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